June 13, 2005
newer/older Jetta

I never did mention that there is a new Jetta that gets me from place to place. It is an '84 this time around with just over 300,000km (though the diesel engine has only seen about 40,000km, unlike the previous '86 Jetta whose original engine made it some 440,000km). It is old enough to have the fancy old VW hubcaps. I have grown quite fond of it, and Orion has been kind enough to help me with some of its quirks . . . these include getting the stereo and even such frivolous items as the parking brake and signal lights. He also managed to get the driver's door sorted out; I had been unable to exit the car using the traditional method (though my original idea of leaving by the passenger door turned out to be kind of dumb as the external handle was just a window-roll-down away).

I am also a master at parallel parking this new car, despite its lack of a right-side mirror and non-power steering. (Having published this statement in print, I am sure to fail spectacularly next time one of you is around.)

Posted at 11:40 PM

January 13, 2005
Air Care, part the second

The results are in, and it's not pretty. Due to the substantial repairs that would be required to make even some difference in the Jetta's test scores, it will be moving back to the Island. We may one day see the return of this fine car to the mainland, but if not, we certainly had a good run.

I won't be changing the category just yet, though . . . as Brian alluded to, there may be another Jetta soon enough. Stay tuned . . .

Posted at 06:40 PM

do you have a picture of this smegma coloured jetta?

Posted by: dave on January 28, 2005 12:11 AM

Not just now, but I will take one and post it in a couple weeks.

I think it's an '85, if that helps.

Posted by: warcode on January 28, 2005 04:48 AM

January 11, 2005
Air Care, part the first

I've now spent quite a bit of time with the Jetta. It is the same car from the Randy debacle of years past (no, nothing ever did come of that). I've moved to and from the priries more than once with it carrying my stuff. And if spending is any indicator, I like it more than any of my other hobbies (except maybe drinking, if that is a hobby: discuss). In honour of this, I am renaming the warcode vs. Randy category on the right to Jetta news (besides, Randy has now had more than his share of press).

So I'm going to be a bit forgiving when a little smoke puffs out now and then. Yes, I know this is not all that friendly to the environment, but I'm probably feeling better about it by having a car with fairly low gas consumption, or something. Anyway, that point is moot, as I am now in the process of bringing the Jetta up to the Air Care standards of Bc's Lower Mainland (or, if you like, Greater Vancouver). The first test was quite a failure, but as the car has never seen any kind of emissions control, I have high hopes for the retest.

Also, for those of you in the know, I did finally get that seatbelt repaired this week, so now the driver need no longer buckle into the passenger's belt clasp. Please don't tell anybody how long this was broken.

Posted at 09:13 PM

warren, you are the stephen hawking of drinking.

and as for the jetta vs. aircare, here are some things to do:

1 - new plugs
2 - new catalytic converter
3 - new air filter?
4 - methyl hydrate in the gas tank
5 - maybe new o2 sensor?
6 - talk to orion

good luck. go jetta go!

Posted by: michal on January 12, 2005 05:55 PM

And NOS! You need NOS!

Posted by: tedmunds on January 12, 2005 09:01 PM

Actually, it looks like the car is more in need of:

7 - new engine that doesn't destroy other parts by leaking oil.

Posted by: warcode on January 12, 2005 10:09 PM

or you could put studded tires on so that they automatically have to pass you as they can't put studded tires on the dyno.

Posted by: beth on January 13, 2005 03:42 AM

I hear they sell NOS kits at Canadian Tire these days...huzzah!

In other news, I drove a newish 2002 Jetta the other day. Drove nice, but the pickup was a little limp. Mind you, it does get like 60 mpg, but I don't think they would like the Ontario winters too much.

Have fun driving the smegma yellow Jetta...

Posted by: bricode on January 13, 2005 05:04 AM

TimE: Actually, NO was part of the emissions problem. If only there was some way to harness that to make NOS boosts.

Michal: Did you mentiont this Stephen Hawking thing recently? I sure can't remember.

Posted by: warcode on January 14, 2005 12:41 AM

Oh yeah, and I forgot to say that your ideas were good, Michal. I did talk to Orion at some point. And the O2 sensor has apparently "been tampered with" at some stage, who knows when.

Posted by: warcode on January 14, 2005 12:44 AM

September 29, 2003
Happy anniversary jackass.

Well, I suppose it is time to close the chapter of my life that involves the nefarious Randy. It is now one year since that rainy night in Saskatoon, which marks the end of the claim perioid as far as the super-helpful SGI people are concerned.

Posted at 02:00 PM

i hope he's sitting somewhere with his car wrapped around a tree. fuck s'toon and all its stupid drunk drivers. hopefully more drunks take the bus in halifax.

Posted by: brian on October 4, 2003 09:52 AM

April 15, 2003
no progress has been made

So Randy has not updated his address record with SGI. Tsk tsk. I guess it's time to sic a professinal locator on him. Hopefully something turns up. Unfortunately (and ironically), this professional locator guy has had trouble getting back to me. I should maybe take that as a sign.

Posted at 12:11 PM

April 04, 2003
the search begins

Well, to answer yesterday's question, they don't get too mad at you if you have to cancel a court date. I suppose this sort of thing happens a lot.

Next week, I will return to SGI (whom I still blame for this silly situation) and try to extract a new address for our favourite defendant. Will the information be there? Will anyone talk to me? Stay tuned . . .

Posted at 05:07 PM

this is a one time thing as to not ruin this site but...Warren is Gay :)

Posted by: Eager Beaver on April 11, 2003 04:49 PM

April 03, 2003
and then *poof* he was gone

So just when we thought we had him, Randy Soze is nowhere to be found. I'm a bit disappointed in the bailiff service I used, because they waited until the last day the summons could be served to inform me that they our elusive friend no longer lives at the address I gave them.

Tomorrow, I will find out both what options a person has in tracking down another person, and also how angry the Saskatchewan Small Claims Court people get when you have to cancel a trial.

Posted at 11:42 PM

he probably disappeared with the help of his turkish cousin, keyser soze.

Posted by: ben on April 4, 2003 05:24 PM

March 18, 2003
the documents have arrived

Since I was busy doing other things and not especially devoted to pursuing my case, I didn't file my claim against our good buddy Randy until last week. But things are in motion now: today I received the summons, which I have to serve right away. The court date is April 14th. Pretty soon, really. I'm still hoping he won't show up (but will have the money to pay, of course).

I'll keep you posted.

Posted at 08:05 PM

November 12, 2002
if that's the way he wants, well, he gets

Just a quick update on my upcoming court funfest. Our friend Randy has chosen to ignore my plea for compromise, so now we move on to Phase 2: filing a small claim. This involves writing a bunch of letters, photocopying them, and paying $20.

This is of course necessary preparation for Phase 3: see you in court and Phase 4: see you in Hell.

Posted at 12:14 PM

so, i take it "phase 5: profit" will rely on us
harvesting randy's organs for sale on the
black market?

thought so...

Posted by: michal on November 12, 2002 12:20 PM

Crap, I knew I forgot to include the profit phase. Now the whole plan will need to be redesigned.

I suppose the money will be made when I whomp him in court.

Posted by: warcode on November 13, 2002 12:28 AM

October 17, 2002
Hey, guess who's going to court?

Bad news from SGI today. Our friend Randy refuses to acknowledge that he (driving his car) was at the scene of his accident with me. Since his car is now totalled, there is no way to match up the damage with my car. SGI now says they can't do anything about it, and I have to take him to small claims court.

I spent the rest of the day driving around collecting information for my case. While I have nothing strictly physical, I have a lot of compelling information in terms of when I phoned police, ICBC, and SGI. I haven't sued anybody before, but I intend to do it properly.

The ironic thing for Randy is that, if he loses, he will have to pay the whole $1400 to repair my car, whereas if he had come clean but refused to admit he was drunk, he probably could have gotten away just paying his $700 deductable for the accident and letting insurance cover the rest. But we already know Randy isn't all that clever.

Posted at 05:55 PM

Dude, that is *lame*. What a wanker. You should write a cron job to dial up his house at ramdon hours saying "Drunk driving is for losers. Drunk driving is for you. Loser."

Posted by: bricode on October 17, 2002 06:05 PM

Maybe watching Law & Order all these years will actually help out with your case. Hopefully your lawyer will be like that hot, hot, dark haired one. Chances are though that he won't even show for his case (what, like he's going to *drive* there?) which means you're gonna kick ass.

The way I see things: he totals his car because he's drunk, you have a totaled car because he was drunk, you called the cops AND SGI (and ICBC), what for shits and giggles? You have no prior knowledge of this guy except that he's a fucko, and named Randy.

Posted by: bricode on October 17, 2002 06:26 PM

do you have mister randy's address?

paging doctor easton, doctor easton, to surgery...

Posted by: michal on October 17, 2002 06:47 PM

I will have his address soon enough. I have to mail him a letter of demand, which he will ignore, then two weeks later I get to mail him a summons.

I haven't decided which lawyer connexions to use just yet. I am related to a bunch of lawyers (second cousins), plus I have a friend whose dad is a partner at a law firm, plus I played volleyball with a lawyer. Not to mention my ties to the former Dean of Law at U of S (currently the president of the university).

I bet all Randy has is his drinking buddy and his finger up his ass.

I want to win this so badly. This guy is such a cock.

Posted by: warcode on October 18, 2002 12:42 AM

I wonder if this log means that he can't get a fair trial anywhere with internet access.

Also, I worry that bricode is referring to Abby over Claire. That just won't do.

Posted by: sav on October 18, 2002 08:31 PM

Don't worry, this is small claims court, not the Supreme Court of the State of New York. It's just a judge, no jury. Think "Peoples' Court" or "Judge Judy".

Posted by: warcode on October 19, 2002 02:20 AM

dude, winning this is going to be too easy. you need more of a challenge.

i say when the court date comes, you show up drunk.

Posted by: dave on October 21, 2002 03:37 AM

... or sans pants.

Posted by: tim on October 22, 2002 12:58 PM

is it a coincidence that claire from l&o was also hit by a drunk driver?

Posted by: beth on October 30, 2002 06:57 PM

what the fuck iz this site its a bunch of shite.

Posted by: lauren on September 12, 2003 04:03 AM

October 15, 2002
drunk drivers: 2 warcode: 0

I now attract drunk drivers, apparently. I was in a friend's car tonight, in a parking lot after the mediocre movie Knockaround Guys, and this kid whipped around a corner and caught us on the front corner of the car. Not super damaged, but the whole thing will end up, as usual, as a real hassle. And again, the dumbfuck in the other car is drunk. We even talked to a couple bouncers at the bar nearby (we needed a pen) and they said he had been in there for quite a while.

As for my own car, I am currently dealing with SGI (Saskatchewan Government Insurance). The winner who hit me claims that he was nowhere near the intersectino where I was hit. The only reason he is still talking to them is because he plowed into a parked semi about 40 minutes after he hit me, and his car is no longer drivable. I'm not really sure what he thinks he can get away with . . . the insurance adjuster is clearly not a fan of his. He didn't even pay to have his car released from the towing place so they could match his (now even more mangled) car up to mine at the claims centre. A real gem, this one. My theory is that SGI is now trying to release any kind of responsibility they have on account of him being drunk, which means that I will have to get them to talk to ICBC (Insurance Corporation of British Columbia, who insures my car) to explain that it wasn't my fault. I can't imagine that any of this will happen quickly, which is a little disconcerting as I was hoping to take my car to Calgary as the first stage of my upcoming trip to San Diego, and while I'm 95% sure the $1300 damage will be fully paid for, I'm not sure when that will happen.

And while I'm at it, in case any of you are driving around Saskatoon, watch out for Randy McMurtry, currently known to you as "the guy who hit me". I initially thought SGI had his name when I first called because he had owned up to what he did, but no, it was the people from the second accident who had called. Instead, he has chosen to deny everything and refused to take responsibility. Anyway, Randy McMurtry is his name, and he can fuck right off.

I can only wish my buddy better luck with what happened tonight.

Posted at 11:56 AM

September 29, 2002

My favourite thing to happen to me while driving home tonight was getting rear-ended by some drunk fuck. Drunk enough to get in the car, barely sober enough to know he didn't want any cops around, but fucking asinine enough to still drive around and include the back end of my car as one of his destinations.


Posted at 11:57 PM

Suing for whiplash?

Or did you just beat the shit out of him and be done with it?

Posted by: savvy on September 30, 2002 03:42 PM

Can you sue in Saskatchewan? Or do they have no-fault? In Alberta, Braithwaite Boyle and Associates would have arrived well before the police, statement of claim ready for your approval and signature.

Posted by: Evan on September 30, 2002 04:12 PM

Sorry guys, this is a no-fault province. Which means you get all the rehab you want at no charge, but you can't rake in the big bucks. Though, having met this class act of a guy, I don't think there are really any big bucks to be had. I'll settle for getting my car fixed.

Posted by: warcode on October 1, 2002 02:05 AM

Is the no fault insurance in Saskatchewan so that everyone can drink some serious road pops, then go out for a spin? Or is it for the winter when everything freezes and you're cruising around with bald tires in your phat pontiac?

Posted by: bricode on October 3, 2002 11:17 AM